The Pornographic Imagination

Imagine one long endless scene that begins with your first sexual experience and ends with you on the bed of the truck in your middle life trying to convince your wife to play The Princess and the American Tourist. A few words are exchanged and are stupid. I'll elaborate: picture Bulgaria. See me as a man with a solid gold cock. You are a princess disguised as poor, barely wearing a poor smock. You are a royal virgin. Luckily, today, your pubic place is open for business. A Pastoral Interlude: a farmhand takes a maiden on a flatbed truck; the princess wanders off; she masturbates on her knees near a goat who wears a bell and baas to claim himself. It's a stupid world before language, a timeless place where princess and tourist wiggle and buck.

My Brother and I Fought with Fists

I think I threw the first punch—
until you've punched your brother in the face
it's easy to talk a good fight, but
you don't know what a fight feels like

until you've punched your brother in the face,
the give of flesh and bone against flesh and bone, 
you don't know what a fight feels like,
fists hit, our faces crimson,

the give of flesh and bone against flesh and bone,  
we didn't duck or block what we needed to give,   
fists hit, our faces crimson,
and we were brothers so we fought like hell—

we didn't duck or block what we needed to give,   
down the hall, down the stairs, past the picture of the Pope,
and we were brothers so we fought like hell—
our rage carried us to the place that brothers go

down the hall, down the stairs, past the picture of the Pope
where love is a danger,   
our rage carried us to the place that brothers go
(and he looked up to me, as a younger brother would),

where love is a danger   
I was bigger but he was strong 
(and he looked up to me, as a younger brother would)—
we punched and punched into the living room

I was bigger but he was strong, 
I'm ashamed I didn't cry—
we punched and punched into the living room
I beat him in front of our mother,

I'm ashamed I didn't cry—
we screamed our worst—Cheater, Fat Fuck, Dumb Ass, Dick,
I beat him in front of our mother,
I couldn't stop, I never stop,

we screamed our worst—Cheater, Fat Fuck, Dumb Ass, Dick—
I go too far, my worst weakness and greatest hope  
I couldn't stop, I never stop,
he lost every time he tried to win

I go too far—my worst weakness and greatest hope   
what to say to my brother, that I was young?   
he lost every time he tried to win,
I think I threw the first punch.