It seems that the latest internet fashion is to have a blog. What has your blog done for you lately?

My blog never does anything for me. It just sits there, staring at me. One time I found it going through my drawers. It's a long story and this is not the time or the place to tell it. Maybe when things aren't so hard.

Are you working on a manuscript at this time? Tell us about it.

I'm working on a few things at the same time, or "simultaneously" as we say in the biz: a new poetry book, a stage play, a children's book, my autobiography and my will in which I leave my children an unfinished poetry book, an unfinished stage play, an unfinished children's book, an unfinished autobiography and a completed will.

It seems that Ted Kooser and many other poets revise their poems over 30, 40, 100s of times. Tell us, what is your process for revisions?

I never revise. I have four books that are actually excruciatingly long single poems. I put those together like puzzles; piece by piece, idea by idea. I've been told that they're brilliant and fascinating works of literature destined to be interpreted, argued and discusssed for generations to come, but I don't understand a word of them.

Do you find that you have a theme in your poems that you have explored several times in your writing?

The running theme in most of my poems is whackjobs, nutcases, politicians, and lunatics.

What question would you ask yourself if you were interviewing you and what is your answer.

If I were interviewing me (and don't think I haven't) I would ask, "Could you loan me five bucks?" And the answer would be a flat out "No".

If you could have cafe with any poet who would it be?

The poet I would choose to have cafe with would be myself , out of sheer curiosity because I've heard of myself for so long and have been dying to meet me in person. But I know that not long into the conversation I would excuse myself to go to the bathroom and then I would crawl out the bathroom window never to return, leaving me to pay the bill.

What advise do you have for someone just starting out as a writer?

Advice I would give to someone just starting out in poetry is to quit your day job and get ready to make a ton of money.

Do you have a poem that you never published because it was too personal and would you allow me to publish it in this interview?

I would never write a poem that would be too personal to publish. I'd be too embarrassed to write it.